reddit網友：為什麼中國男人會避開有弟弟的女人？

正文翻譯

原創翻譯：龍騰網 翻譯：翻譯加工廠 轉載請註明出處

-------------譯者：Moonrabbit-審核者：龍騰翻譯總管------------

"I went on a blind date. But because the girl has a younger brother my mother refused the match immediately."

「我去相親了。但因為女方有個弟弟，我媽立馬就拒掉了那次相親。」

I saw this post on Chinese social network Weibo recently. The publisher was advising men not to marry a woman with a younger brother.

我最近在新浪微博上看到了這個故事。博主勸告其他男士不要娶一個有弟弟的女性。

Being a woman with a brother and whose husband has an older sister I was shocked by such advice and even more surprised that many people actually agree with this opinion. However as I read their explanations I slowly came to understand their worries.

作為一個有兄弟、且丈夫有個姐姐的已婚女性，我對這樣的建議感到十分震驚，而更令我驚訝的是，回復中有不少人居然贊同這個觀點。然而，當我讀完他們的回復，我漸漸明白他們擔憂的根源。

What concerns them the most is that the younger brother and possibly his family would become a burden to the sister"s husband after the marriage.

令他們最為不安的是這個小舅子，乃至是這個小舅子今後的家庭，會成為男方婚後的負擔。

They argue that most families with a male as the second child have a preference for boys over girls; otherwise they would not have another child after their daughter.

他們認為大部分二胎為男孩的家庭重男輕女的現象會比較突出；否則，這些家庭也不會在生了女兒後還繼續生孩子。

As a result they believe that the sister is always made to help take care of her brother who is often spoiled. So even after the sister marries she will keep helping her little brother. "Such families often ask for more betrothal gifts just to enrich the brother"s when he marries" wrote another internet user.

於是乎，他們相信姐姐在生活中總是要幫忙照顧弟弟，而這麼做的後果就是弟弟被寵壞了。所以即使婚後，姐姐還是會這麼關照自己的弟弟。其中一個網友回復表示，「這種家庭往往會為了給弟弟娶老婆在嫁姐姐的時候索要更多聘禮。」

They are not entirely wrong because a preference for boys does exist in China even in some big cities.

回復的意見並非都是錯的，因為重男輕女在當今中國依然存在，哪怕是在某些大城市。

For some people the men carry the family line after marriage while the women belong to their husband"s family.

於某些人來說，家族延續的希望在於男丁，女兒出嫁後只能延續夫家的香火是男方家的人了。

-------------譯者：Moonrabbit-審核者：龍騰翻譯總管------------

The traditional mindset that the older child should always make allowances for the younger one has made big sisters much less favored as ideal wives. I have also read news about how some girls were not properly educated because their families could not afford to send both children to school.

傳統觀念認為較年長的子女應該照顧體諒年幼的弟妹；這種觀念使得有弟弟的姐姐們在擇偶方面不受人待見。通過新聞，我還知道有些女孩不能受到充分教育的原因是她們的家庭供不起讓兩個孩子一起讀書；（所以弟弟會接受完整教育，而姐姐則提早輟學）

That post reminded me of what a girlfriend once said about "marriage advice" to women.

這條微博不禁讓我想起我的一個女性朋友，她曾說過的給女性的「婚姻建議。」

She told me never to marry a man with a brother because the wives of the two brothers are not likely to get along never marry a man who is an only child because he would be spoiled and never marry a man with a sister because a sister-in-law would be troublesome.

她告訴我不要嫁給一個有兄弟的男人，因為妯娌之間很難相處融洽；不要嫁給獨生子因為他可能被寵壞了；別嫁給一個有姐妹的男人，因為大姑子或者小姑子會是個麻煩。

"When two people are in a relationship it is only a thing between the two people but when the two get married it becomes a thing between two families." This is what my high school teacher told me but I did not truly understand it until I got married.

「戀愛是兩個人之間的事；而婚姻是兩個家庭間的事。」我的高中老師曾這麼對我說過；直到我結婚了，我才真正明白這句話的含義。

Happiness headaches and fights exist in every family regardless of the family members and those who want to avoid this are only afraid of taking responsibility.

每個家庭都存在幸福、麻煩事和爭吵，這不因家庭成員的身份而能避免；因為這些因素而不成家的人只是害怕承擔責任。

Most of us are only children who grew up being the center of attention.

我們大多數人在成長中都是家裡人關注的中心。

As a result we still wish to be the king or queen in our marriage.

於是，在婚姻中我們也希望自己是家中的國王或者女王。

Therefore what others can give us instead of what we can do for our partner is what many people think about.

因此，很多人都想著對方能給予自己什麼，卻不去想自己能給予對方什麼。

Equality between males and females is another important concept that many Chinese need to accept.

很多中國人需要接受的另一個重要觀念是：男女平等。

評論翻譯

原創翻譯：龍騰網 翻譯：翻譯加工廠 轉載請註明出處

-------------譯者：Moonrabbit-審核者：龍騰翻譯總管------------

–]KyleEvans[S] 11 指標 1 天前

Anybody else with this problem? In-laws who are shamelessly biased in favour of your wife"s brother?

誰還遇到過這種問題？像是岳父岳母偏袒小舅子？

[–]PolypinoonEuropean unx 32 指標 1 天前

I have a buddy who is married to a Chinese girl who has a younger brother. And yes he gets all the praise while she gets all the flack. All the money and the house will go to him none to her. He can do no wrong she can only do wrong.

我的好朋友娶了一位有弟弟的中國女士。是的，小舅子得到的總是表揚而他的妻子總是被數落。所有的存款和房產將來都是他的，而不是她的。他不可能會犯錯，而她，只會犯錯。

This is Chinese Confucianism at its "finest". The son is glorious and the daughter is seen as a piece of shit. And that extends to whatever guy she marries. I can"t blame Chinese men for avoid these girls. They already have enough filial piety bullshit to deal with in their own family.

這就是中國儒家思想的「最完美」展示。兒子是家族榮耀而女兒則一文不值。而這種歧視還延續到了女兒今後嫁的男人身上。我不能譴責中國男性對於這種女性的排斥。他們自己家的那攤破事就已經夠棘手的了。

[–]Smirth 24 指標 1 天前

Chinese women are life support systems for a son-creating womb

I wish this was a ridiculous stereotype but I had multiple chinese teachers who were sent back to their village for an arranged marriage.

It"s so shit

中國女性不過是用來生兒育兒的移動子宮。我真希望這只是個愚昧的成見，但我認識好幾位中國老師被要求回到家鄉嫁給一個家裡安排好的男人。這真是太操蛋了！

[–]Lewey_B 5 指標 1 天前

In traditional chinese culture once the daughter is married she 「changes families」 and becomes her husband"s family member that might be an explanation. Basically only males are considered real members of the family.

在中國傳統文化中，嫁出去的女兒就是「潑出去的水」，從此和娘家再無瓜葛變成是夫家的人了，可能這就是這種現象出現的根本原因。基本上只有男丁才被認為是家族的真正成員。

[–]PM_me-your_bicycle 7 指標 1 天前*

China is one of a few countries where the suicide rate among women is higher than among men. Bangladesh has highest suicide rate among women China is the second one.

Edit: the Bangladesh / China situation was in 1999. Overall suicide rate is probably lower in China these days.

中國是世界上少數幾個女性自殺率比男性高的國家之一。孟加拉國的女性自殺率全球第一，而中國是第二名。

補充：上述數據源於1999年的調查。現今中國的女性總體自殺率可能比當時低。

[–]Tommust 10 指標 1 天前

A co-worker told me that she had a massive argument with her parent because they didn"t want to pay for her uni education since they were saving the money for the younger brother"s education. She was in her late 30s so maybe attitudes has changed towards women since.

我的一位同事告訴我她曾經和家裡因為大學學費的事大吵了一架；她的父母不想供她讀大學，因為他們要省錢供弟弟讀書。她現在快40歲了，可能現在對女性的態度跟之前不一樣了。

[–]HautamakiCanada 18 指標 1 天前

I had a gf with a younger brother. I wish I knew then what I know now. The kid was a piece of shit. Dropped out of school at 17. Did no work. Wanted to be a gangster. Robbed cash and my laptop out of my house to get in good with a gang. Ended up in jail. Gf and her father covered for him the whole time he was their perfect angel. Finally when he was in jail they had to admit he robbed me and promised to pay me back. They never did. This isn』t an uncommon story; fuck younger brothers.

我的前女友有個弟弟。我希望我當時就明白我現在知道的這些事。那個小子就是個王八蛋。17歲就輟學了。不工作。想當個混混。他從我家搶走我的現金還有筆記本電腦，就為了向某個幫派示好。現在被關在牢里。她和她的父親從頭到尾都在包庇這小子，因為他可是他們心中的乖寶寶。最後等他入獄了，他們才不得不承認是這小子搶了我的錢財並保證一定會還我錢。然而他們並沒有遵守約定。這不是一個具有共性的故事：去你媽的小舅子！

-------------譯者：曉尹子-審核者：龍騰翻譯總管------------

[–]marmakoide 7 指標 1 天前

My in-laws don"t do that they really put my wife and her younger bro on an equal footing. They are not educated people but they have I don"t how to name that a certain intelligence of the heart ? As a result my brother in law is a guy who is not acting like an emperor he always helps a lot his parents or us and respects my wife ie. his sister. He is a genuine good guy free from a lot of those traits that we decry often on this sub.

我的岳父岳母不會做那種事情，他們對我、我的妻子和我的小舅子是一視同仁的。他們雖然沒接受過教育，但是他們有一種我不知道該如何形容的品質，大概是一種心靈的智慧？因此，我的小舅子不像個皇帝般，他為人處世非常好，總會對他的父母和我們夫妻倆給予很多幫助，他也很尊敬我的妻子。他是一個純粹的好人，沒有那些我們經常譴責的不好品性。

[–]HotNaturedUnited States 12 指標 1 天前

This is exactly our experience. My wife has twin younger brothers! And it"s become a sort of perfect storm: (1) their father was diagnosed with cancer so the two started running his business (one the factories the other the finances) at the age of 19 (2) she has an older sister too who is extremely traditional (lives in HK and participates in anti-independence protests has a very traditional Chinese marriage in which she is subservient despite the fact that her family bought them their apt and got the guy his job) (3) the dad is a total dog with multiple other women so he rarely spends time around the mom (4) they"re from a T3 (5) my wife would have been aborted if not for a sonogram confusion and her mom aborted at least 4 times in between her and the brothers & (6) my wife studied liberal arts in the states (where we met) so she"s well-versed in things like gender studies and the patriarchy.

這是我們的真實經歷。我妻子有對雙胞胎弟弟！而事情最後發展到就如大災難一般：

（1）他們父親被診斷出得了癌症，所以那倆兄弟在19歲的時候就開始替他父親經營生意了（一個管理工廠方面，一個管理財務）；（2）我妻子還有一個姐姐，姐姐是個非常傳統的女人（她生活在香港，多次參加反獨立抗議活動，她過著非常傳統的婚姻生活：她對她的丈夫卑躬屈膝，儘管實際上是她的家庭給他們買的公寓，連她丈夫的工作也是她家裡幫忙找的）;(3)他們的父親就是個渣男，和很多女人鬼混過，他很少花時間陪他們的母親；（4）他們居住在3線城市；（5）如果不是B超圖弄錯了，我妻子根本不可能出生，她媽媽在生她和她兩弟弟之間至少流過4次產；（6）我妻子在美國（我們相遇的地方）學的是文科，所以她對像兩性研究和父權制之類的非常精通。

This all came to a head this CNY and she has been antagonizing her sister on wechat and arguing with her mom ever since. We left early even. The short version is that my wife feels her opinion means fuck all to her mom meanwhile the younger brothers make all of the big family decisions now financial and otherwise. She"s trying not to blame her mom as much and just see it as backwards traditional Chinese bull shit but her childhood was fucked because of it. I"ve heard so many examples but this one stuck: when her mom would make chicken her brothers were each given the leg + thigh. If my wife tried to take it she would be beat and sent away without dinner. Here"s a more recent example: a commercial tenant at a property the family owns left ahead of the contract with back rent owed so my wife found a lawyer and pretty much handled everything - - just needed the go-ahead. The mom balked has had her agent call my wife to ask the same shit and now has the brother driving in from their hometown to see the same lawyer. It"s inane.

這一切矛盾衝突在今年新年的時候達到了臨界點，自那之後，她和她姐姐在微信上互相敵對，和她媽媽也爭吵不斷。我們甚至早早地就離開了。故事的簡短版本就是，我妻子覺得她的意見對她媽媽來說一文不值，與此同時，弟弟們現在執掌家庭的大權了，經濟上和其他的一些方面都由他們來決定。她試著盡量不去責怪她的母親，她把這些看做是中國傳統（文化價值觀里）的糟粕，但是這些毀了她的童年。我聽說過很多這種例子，但是這個卻讓我最為震驚：當她媽媽燒雞的時候，他的弟弟們一人一個雞腿。如果我的妻子想要吃雞腿的話，她會被打甚至被罰不讓吃飯。還有一個最近的例子，他們家有一個商鋪的所有權，結果租戶拖欠租金，所以我妻子找個律師完美解決了這件事——僅僅只需要直接去做罷了。她媽媽畏畏縮縮的，竟然讓她的代理打電話給我妻子來問同樣的問題，現在還讓她一個弟弟開車去見同一個律師。這實在是太愚蠢了。

Anyway she"s told me that she read somewhere that the one-child policy elevated the status of women in many households but households with a son and daughter actually get even worse than previous generations lmfao

反正，她告訴我她看到一些文章說獨生子女政策使得女人在很多家庭中的地位有所提高，但是有兒有女的家庭中女人的地位卻比前一代的情況更糟糕，這真是笑死我了。

-------------譯者：騎烏龜。追兔子-審核者：龍騰翻譯總管------------

[–]MrsPandaBear 4 指標 1 天前

It』s never been an issue in my family. My mom is the oldest of four. She has a younger brother and two younger sisters. Her parents encouraged her to pursue education and career and she ended up moving away eventually to America. She said most of household chores and caring for the younger sisters fell on her younger brother who was the oldest after she left. There was never any favoritism or channeling of resources towards him as far as my mom could tell. It was surprising that grandma gave her greatest asset her house to my uncle but my uncle was designated her caretaker once she got up in age. She lived with him for ten years until her death and they did the day to day care taking. I guess the designated caretaker typically gets all the assets.

在我家裡，這樣的事從不是個問題。我的母親是他們4個兄弟姐妹中最大的，她有一個弟弟和兩個妹妹。她的父母鼓勵她求學和追求事業，最終，她離開家鄉去了美國。她說大部分家務活和照顧妹妹的擔子都落在了排行老二、自她離開後最大的弟弟身上。據我母親所說，她的父母並沒有對於弟弟有任何偏袒。奇怪的是祖母把她的最大資產給了我叔叔，但是同時我叔也被指定為在我祖母年事已高時的照看人。祖母和叔叔在一起生活有十年之久，叔叔也日復一日的照顧祖母直到祖母逝世。我猜被指定的照看人確實該獲得所有遺產。

On my dad』s aside he was the oldest son he had three brothers and one sister. With caring for the grandparents my dad provided most of their funds and helped to organize their care. His brothers all contributed with help or money. His sister never did anything never contributed money and rarely came to help my grandma out. I don』t know if she was marginalized over her brothers growing up...if she was she has the right to walk away I think.

在我父親這邊，他是長子，他有三個弟弟和一個妹妹。在照顧祖父母的過程中，我的父親提供了大部分資金並組織照顧祖父母。他的所有弟弟要麼提供幫助要麼提供錢。但是，他的妹妹卻沒做任何事，從沒拿出一分錢，也很少過來幫忙照顧我祖母。我不知道她是否在其兄長們的成長過程中被父母冷落了……如果是這樣的話，我想她有權一走了之。

Most other Chinese I know are family friends or family. Almost all have only child』s so it』s hard for me to say if a boy would have been more favored. What I』ve seen is that parents with only a daughter tended to push their daughter to be successful perhaps displacing that ambition from a son. It stands to reason that if a family went to great length to have a son they probably do favor the son over the daughter. However I』m cautious about blaming patriarchy for all cases. Some families simply favor one child over another.

大多數我認識的中國人都是家裡的朋友或者是家人、親戚。幾乎所有的人都只有獨生子女，所以我很難說一個男孩是否會更受青睞。但是，我看到的是只有一個女兒的父母往往會把他們的女兒培養得更成功，或許，這是把對兒子的期望轉移到女兒身上了。（譯者註：說的有點像，摔跤吧，爸爸的意思）按理說，如果一個家庭有一個兒子，他們可能會比女兒更喜歡兒子。然而，我不認為所有案例的緣由都是父權制導致的。有些家庭單純只是更偏愛一個孩子多過其他孩子罷了。

[–]laowailaoshistyleUnited States 8 指標 1 天前

Have seen this myself from stories told me by my female Chinese students about their arranged marriages and receiving little compared to their brothers. Also in general have seen a lot of situations where families play favorites in order to keep at least one child and their spouse living close to the family in order to take care of the parents; they"re very manipulative.

我曾經在我的中國女學生那裡聽到過這樣的故事，相對於她們的兄弟，她們受到（父母的關注）很少且常被包辦婚姻。而且總的來說，大多數情況下，父母玩偏愛遊戲是為了保證至少有一個孩子和其配偶能夠住得離家裡近些以便照顧他們；他們（對孩子）的控制欲很高。

More than one American friend who married a local told me the son in his wife"s family was just a totally lazy spoiled brat and the whole family always tried to funnel resources his way even though he was rarely or never employed including trying to manipulate the foreigner"s Chinese wife to get him to provide for her brother.

不止一個和當地人結婚的美國朋友告訴我，在他妻子的家庭里，兒子完全是個被寵壞的懶孩子，儘管他很少或者說永遠不可能會找到工作，整個家族還是找尋人脈資源為他鋪路，這包括試圖控制這個外國朋友的中國妻子給她的弟弟提供幫助。

In this case he told me when he realized the brother-in-law was a mooch he stopped giving any money to his wife"s family and the wife was happy about it but she could not be the one to initiate that decision.

在這種情況下，他告訴我，當他發現小舅子是個遊手好閒蹭吃蹭喝的懶貨時，他就不再給他妻子的娘家任何錢了，他的妻子也很樂見於此，但是她不能是發起做出這項決定的人。

Because she was older had her own career and the foreign husband was financially independent the family had no way to guilt trip them and the matter was just dropped and relations continued without any drama. This was a local woman born in the 70"s but my students are born in 80"s and 90"s.

因為她比較年長且有自己的事業，同時她的外籍丈夫在經濟上獨立自主，所以家裡沒辦法用內疚罪惡感去責難套牢他們，事情就這樣平息了，他們的關係在沒任何戲劇性發展的情況下繼續下去了。這是個在生於70年代的當地女性身上所發生的事，但是我的學生們大多是80後和90後。

-------------譯者：Moonrabbit-審核者：龍騰翻譯總管------------

[–]tory1989 5 指標 1 天前

I"m Chinese living in China.

I think such things exist here but not in a large scale.

Ppl don"t do this especially in large cities.

我是中國人，現居國內。我認為文章中提及的現象的確存在，但普遍性不高。特別是大城市裡的居民根本不會在乎這些。

But I do know that parents of a girl would always ask for gift money before the girl is married believing the man should pay for them for their parenting since he will take her away for like a lifetime.

But it depends. It is considered a tradition and many of the modern Chinese would ask for a symbolic amount.

但的確女方家長通常都會在女兒出嫁前要聘禮，他們認為自己養育女兒理應得到報償，畢竟女兒要和男方過一輩子了。但是這個現象還是看人的。聘禮被看作是一項傳統，當代的很多女方家長只會要男方象徵性地出一些錢。

[–]Raplaplaf 2 指標 1 天前

It really depends on where you live.

這真的和你住在哪個地區有關係。

[–]annadpk 4 指標 1 天前

It doesn"t make sense. Why should Chinese men avoid a woman with a younger brother on the premise that the parents spoil the younger brother? What does that have to with the man"s relations with his wife? How much time will you be spending with the in-laws?

沒道理啊。為什麼中國男人會以女方家長可能會溺愛自己次子的前提下而拒絕一個有弟弟的中國女性呢？這個小舅子會給夫妻關係帶來多大的影響？男方到底又會花多長時間和女方娘家人呆在一起呢？

One thing I learned living in Malaysia when Chinese family sizes used to be large like 4-5 kids well into 1990s is you should avoid Chinese girls with older brothers and no sisters. The more older brothers they have the more spoiled they are. I think that applies to most cultures.

我在馬來西亞生活時學到的一件事是，在20世紀90年代，中國家庭傾向於有4-5個孩子，你要避開的應該是那種有哥哥沒姐妹的中國女性才是。哥哥與其的年齡差越大，那個女性被寵壞的程度就越高。我認為大多數文化都有這種現象。

[–]misken67 16 指標 1 天前

Malaysian Chinese and Chinese Chinese are very different culturally.

馬來華人和大陸華人在文化上非常不一樣。

[–]zakazaw 2 指標 1 天前

Very true. Malaysian Chinese are also different from Hong Kong Chinese.

對的。馬來華人和香港華人也不同。

[–]KeepThat 2 指標 1 天前

Interesting. But in mainland most city families only have one child while in rural 2 to 3. I don"t think now most young people before fall in love with a girl have investaged a girl"s family to figure out how many sisters/bros she has. When the girl become a GF those info not a big deal won"t result a break up.. While before a relationship girls care more about family bkg than man..

真是有趣。然而在大陸，大部分城市居民只有一個孩子，而在農村，每家會有2-3個孩子。我不認為大多數年輕男性在和女性墜入愛河之前，會把女方家裡有幾個兄弟/姐妹的情況給提前調查清楚。而當這位女性升級為女友時，這些信息又無足輕重，起碼不會為此分手....而在感情關係中，女性比男性更在乎對方的家庭背景……

-------------譯者：為非作歹2008-審核者：龍騰翻譯總管------------

[–]annadpk 5 指標 1 天前

Malaysian Chinese families are more "traditional" because they had larger families for longer than those in the PRC. And in the 1950s the fertility rate for Malaysian Chinese was as high as 7 which is higher than in the PRC at the time.

馬來西亞華人家庭更加「傳統」，因為他們是大家庭的時間比中國的那些家庭更久。20世紀50年代，馬來西亞華人的生育率高達7，比當時中國的生育率還高。

Chinese in places like Indonesia and Malaysia had really large families from about 1930-1980s with the average family size being 4-6 kids. But the interesting thing is the generation before that came from China in 1890s-1920 the family sizes were smaller about 2-4 kids I think it has to with better health care and nutrition. You see that in among Malaysian Chinese the grandfather would have 2-3 siblings the father would have 7-8 siblings the son 1-2 siblings.

在20世紀30年代到20世紀80年代，印尼和馬來西亞的華人都是大家庭，平均每家都會有4-6個小孩。但有趣的是，19世紀90年代到20世紀80年代的上一代華人移民中，家庭成員較少，大概只有2-4個小孩，我覺得這是因為醫療保健和營養情況改善所促成的。你看在馬來西亞華人裡面，祖父輩的一般有2-3個兄弟姐妹，父輩的一般有7-8個兄弟姐妹，而兒子輩的有1-2個兄弟姐妹。

Malaysian Chinese / Indonesian Chinese family dynamics even as recently ago as 30-40 years are like Qing Dynasty merchant soap operas because many of them were in business and often live in the same house. I been to some Chinese Indonesian family homes in the 1980s and the whole extended family would live in one large house 4 generations living under one roof.

馬來西亞/印尼華人家庭狀態即使在最近30-40年間，也像是商業電視肥皂劇里的清朝那樣，因為他們中的許多人都是做生意的，且經常是住在同一間房子里的。20世紀80年代我曾經去過一些印尼的華人家裡，他們有的一家4代人都住在一間大房子里，住在同一屋檐下。

Of course its not like that anymore. But to see something like that on a large scale in China you would have to go back to pre-Revolutionary China.

當然，現在的情況已有所不同。但如果你想在中國看到很多類似的這種情況，大概只能穿越到解放前的中國了。

[–]KeepThat -5 指標 1 天前

Nonsense first time heard

胡說八道，我第一次聽說。

[–]Benchen70 9 指標 1 天前

you should go out more

你要多出去走走看看才是。

[–]KeepThat -3 指標 1 天前

Ok it is possible in some places. But in general I think most post 80s & 90s don"t care.

好吧，可能有些地方是那樣，但總的來說我覺得大多數80後90後並不在乎。

[–]Benchen70 4 指標 1 天前

I am post 80"s and I can tell you 4 out of 5 of my Chinese female friends who have younger brothers have this issue. It is also not restricted to China.

我是80後的，我可以告訴你，我有弟弟的女性朋友中80%有這類問題。這種情況也不僅限於在中國。

I have lived in Australia for almost 30 years and many of my Chinese friends are in a similar fashion. There are two groups from China. Either their parents came out around 1989 and early 2000"s or they have just come to Australia in the last 5-6 years. I have Chinese-Malaysian and Hong Kong female friends too. A lot of them describe this issue in their families. This is not just about China. This is about Chinese culture stemming from the view of males being more important than females.

我在澳大利亞生活了近30年，我的許多中國朋友也是類似的情況。有兩批是中國人，他們的父母要麼是在1989年到2000年初來的，要不就是最近5-6年間剛到澳大利亞的。我也有馬來西亞華裔和來自香港的女性朋友，她們都和我訴說了類似的家庭問題。這不止發生在中國。是最初的中國文化價值觀里，男性就比女性更重要。

Edit: I guess you can care or not care. But at the end of the day if every family meeting reminds you of this issue you are going to get really frustrated.

編輯：我覺得你可以選擇在意或者不在意，但如果到了最後，你發現每次家庭聚會都在不斷提醒你這個問題的存在，你是真的會變得很沮喪的。

[–]KeepThat 2 指標 1 天前

It is true Chinese parents prefer boy than girl even most post 80s & 90s prefer to have a boy baby. BUT I am talking about "Why [Chinese] men avoid women with [younger] brothers?" I mean most post 80s & 90s don"t care if their GF has a brother(s)

的確中國父母重男輕女，即使是大多數的80後和90後也會更想要男孩。但我問的是「為什麼中國男人會避開有小舅子的女人？？」大多數80後90後完全不在乎他們的女朋友是不是有弟弟。

[–]Benchen70 1 指標 1 天前

Ah. Thank you. I am sorry for the confusion

啊，謝謝你提醒，不好意思理解錯了。

[–]TheDark1 2 指標 1 天前

But their parents?

那男方的父母在意嗎？

[–]HotNaturedUnited States 3 指標 1 天前

As far as I have read and experienced this is still quite prent basically anywhere that isn"t T1

就我所知和所經歷的來說，這在每個不是1線城市的地方仍是個很普遍存在的嚴重問題。

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