她生世艱難卻三次顛覆粒子物理學，她在母校的演講催人淚下！
原標題：她生世艱難卻三次顛覆粒子物理學，她在母校的演講催人淚下！
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請看今日第一篇對吳秀蘭的採訪
從瓦薩學院到發現希格斯粒子
瓦薩學院2014年度畢業典禮演講
演講者：吳秀蘭 譯者： 丁玖
演講者介紹： 吳秀蘭（Sau-Lan Wu），髙能實驗物理學家。出生於香港，畢業於金文泰中學、Vassar學院和哈佛大學。1974年她參與了丁肇中教授領導的發現J粒子的實驗。1979年她在發現膠子的實驗中起了關鍵性的作用。1995年她和合作者因這個發現獲得了歐洲物理學會髙能和粒子物理獎。 她是通過實驗發現希格斯粒子的研究中發揮了相當關鍵的作用，率先發現希格斯粒子的存在。期間還培養了50名也是成績斐然的物理學博士。吳秀蘭是威斯康辛大學的費米和維拉斯教授，同時也是美國文理學院院士。
Hill校長、Feroe教授、校董們、傑出的教員們、自豪的父母和祖父母們及2014年瓦薩的畢業生們：
謝謝你們給我這巨大的榮譽和難得的機會,使我今天在母校的畢業典禮上演講。Feroe教授告訴我，我是瓦薩學院23年來第一個在畢業典禮上演講的研究型科學家，也是第一位演講的物理學家。
我希望你會發現，我從瓦薩到希格斯粒子的發現之旅既有趣且有啟發性。這個發現之旅始於瓦薩教育，再通過堅毅而綻開花蕾。（開場白）
我曾給自己定下一個目標：一生中至少貢獻三個主要的物理學發現。到目前為止，我已經參與J粒子、膠子和希格斯粒子的發現之舉。I set myself a goal of contributing to at least three major physics discoveries in my lifetime. So far I have participated in the discoveries of the charm quark, the gluon, and the Higgs particle.
我一遍又一遍地告訴我的研究生：在我們也稱為粒子物理的高能物理領域，因為我們的使命是科學發現，納稅人支持我們的科學研究。我的第三個突出參與是希格斯粒子的發現。2012年7月4日，希格斯粒子的發現被公布了;我相信你們已經在《紐約時報》和CNN中獲知這個新聞。在這個發現中，我的威斯康辛大學研究小組成員和我發揮了突出的作用。這個項目如此巨大，以至於兩個各有3000名物理學家的獨立團隊ATLAS和CMS，在位於瑞士日內瓦歐洲核子研究中心實驗室的大型強子撞機上合作研究。這一發現是來自世界各地56個國家約200個機構6000多的科學家經由20年的艱苦努力得到的最終成果。
產生希格斯粒子最有效的方法是通過碰撞兩個膠子。由於膠子在質子中，我們在歐洲核子研究中心通過碰撞兩個非常高能的質子，以產生希格斯粒子。為了找到一個希格斯粒子，它就像在一個足球場大小的乾草堆里撈針。
那些修了科學課程的人可能會問，為什麼電子、質子、中子及我們宇宙中的其他粒子大量存在。這是一個簡單但深度難以回答的問題。發現希格斯粒子讓我們更近一步能回答這個問題。
讓我簡單介紹一下什麼是希格斯粒子。它也被稱為上帝的粒子。
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上帝粒子-希格斯粒子，解釋宇宙的基石 |
希格斯粒子是用於解釋基本粒子如何獲得它們的群體而需要的一個粒子。基本粒子是宇宙的基石。希格斯粒子對從電子到人類及星系所有的群體負責。如果沒有這種粒子，就沒有原子，沒有分子，沒有細胞，當然也沒有人。
這個粒子在1964年由三個理論物理學家弗朗索瓦·恩格勒特(Francis Englert)、羅伯特·布勞特(Robert Brout)和彼得·希格斯(Peter Higgs)提出。去年恩格勒特和希格斯被授予諾貝爾物理學獎；布勞特不幸在兩年前去世。
現在讓我與你分享發現的快樂。2012年6月25日的午夜，在希格斯的發現公布前九天，我的威斯康辛大學研究小組成員，在許多個不眠之夜後，獲得了希格斯粒子存在的明顯證據。6月25日2012年6月25日同一天的下午3時，在歐洲核子研究中心32號大廈一樓的威斯康星走廊里出現了一陣騷動。我們聽到了我的研究生王海晨(Haichen Wang)說：「浩爽(Haoshuang)即將宣布希格斯粒子的發現！」
我們的第一個反應是：這是一個笑話，所以當我們進入我的學生季浩爽(Haoshuang Ji)的辦公室時，我們的臉上掛滿笑容。當我們看到他電腦上畫出的希格斯信號時，那些笑容突然變得更大。很快，歡呼聲響遍了威斯康星走廊。王海晨用視頻記錄了這激動的情景。我們製作了那個希格斯信號圖的大型副本，我小組的所有成員在上面簽了名。它現在歐洲核子研究中心威斯康星走廊的牆上掛著。
這兩個協作的其他小組也觀察到相同的結果，他們有著同樣的興奮，也有自己的故事可講。
在2012年7月4日公布發現的當天，歐洲核子研究中心的大禮堂直到上午9時都被鎖住。為了鼓勵我組的所有學生和博士後見證這個世紀科學活動，我答應給那些在禮堂外通宵排隊的人獎勵100美元。他們都進去了，在公布發現活動結束後，我和希格斯教授握了手。我告訴他：「我已經找了你20多年。」 我將永遠珍惜他的回答：」現在，你已經找到了我。「事實上，從1980年至2012年，它已經花了我32年。 At the end of the announcement of the discovery, I went to shake hands with Prof. Higgs. I told him "I have been looking for you for over 20 years". And I will always cherish his reply: "Now, you have found me」. In fact, it had taken me thirty two years, from 1980 to 2012.
2013年3月5日，我與其他四位物理學家的照片出現在紐約時報的頭版。標題是：追逐希格斯---在尋求物理最難捉摸的粒子中鬥爭並最終取得勝利。
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吳秀蘭教授 |
現在，我想與大家分享我從瓦薩到發現希格斯粒子的旅程。（主體）
我在日本佔領期間出生於香港。我在母親的的懷抱中不時進出防空洞。我的母親是我父親這個香港著名商人的第六妾。但是她不是我父親最喜歡的太太。我的母親和我被遺棄在外，生活在貧民窟里。我的母親和我的弟弟住在租來的小卧室，而我在一個米店走廊有一個租來的床。我長大後有了堅強的信念：經濟上絕不依賴於男人。I grew up with a strong determination to be financially independent of men.
在每天學校結束時，我們排隊和我們的老師說再見，他手裡拿著一條教鞭。我就讀的學校擠滿了學生。每年當教育署的官員來視察時，我不得不躲起來。
在我12歲前，我很少見到我的父親。
然後，我們搬到了一個公寓，我會每周一次看到我的父親，每次幾個小時。當我父親發現我能在腦子裡做兩個3位數乘法，他感動了。我父親認為，成功的關鍵在於英語和算術好。
我的母親在中國的鄉村長大，那時女孩子都不準去上學。因此，我的母親不識字，不能寫，從來沒有工作過。但是在我一生中我的母親是最鼓舞人心的人。在我童年時她就意識到教育的巨大價值。She realized early on in my childhood the tremendous value of education. 她竭盡全力將我和我的弟弟在香港貧民教會學校中換來換去。我最後轉到一所著名的政府高中。
1959年當我高中畢業時，我父親不想讓我上大學。他說``你現在應該賺錢養活自己，並支持你的母親。""我暗暗地申請了美國50所高校，要求全額獎學金。當時只有四所學院說會考慮我的，都是女子學院---喬治亞州的阿格尼斯斯科特學院、弗吉尼亞州的倫道夫-梅肯女子學院、康涅狄格學院和瓦瑟。前三所拒絕了我。所以，我正要被整個美國所拒絕！
在絕望中，1960年4月，我喜出望外地收到一份電報，通知我，我被瓦薩學院接受了，並有全額獎學金。真的，上帝決定送我來瓦薩。（轉機）
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撥雲見霧，衝破雲霄 |
我告訴我的父親，我被瓦薩學院接受了。他碰巧正在紐約，住在一個朋友家裡，那人的女兒5月即將從瓦薩學院畢業。（我真想找到這個1960屆校友並與她見面。）當他1960年5月在這裡參加她的畢業典禮時，我的父親意識到，瓦瑟是一個非常有聲望的學院。不過他抱怨說，在招待會上只有花生米。他對我來到瓦薩深感驕傲。他花了300美元給我買了票，從香港乘威爾遜總統號船17天到達舊金山，然後坐火車到紐約。他給了我40美元零花錢。他警告我不要去參加聚會。如果我失去獎學金，就沒有其他錢給我了！
我登上船的那天是我最後一次見到我的父親。
從香港到舊金山的旅途中，我們遇到了幾次颱風。當時很少人在飯廳里。我看著我的蘋果從船的一邊滾動到另一邊。當我在舊金山下船時，幾位瓦薩校友手拿自家烘焙的蛋糕正等著我。她們非常親切。然後我坐火車從舊金山到紐約，在5天的旅程中，她們的蛋糕是我唯一的食物。我不想花任何錢買吃的。在紐約，瓦瑟校友來接我，並馬上把我帶到宏偉的大都會博物館。它太美妙了，雖然我在長途旅行之後又累又餓且很困！她們又帶我去參觀位於紐約美麗的瓦薩俱樂部。
在瓦薩，我有全額獎學金，包吃包住，美國女孩將衣服捐給外國學生，所以我不必外出購物。因為我的英語差到過不了關，第一個夏天瓦瑟甚至把我送到位於弗吉尼亞州里士滿的一個暑期學校補習英文。瓦瑟真的想確保我會成功和畢業。他們培養我要有恆心和毅力，如果你有的話，你基本上不會失敗。
在瓦薩1960年至1963年的三年內，學校放假期間我感覺自己就像公主般地住在一個豪華的校友會之家。我清楚地記得瓦薩校友沃什伯恩太太邀請我到她位於曼哈頓高檔區的美麗家裡做客。在第一年的復活節假期，我和其他八個外國學生被邀請到白宮與51屆校友傑奎琳·布維爾·肯尼迪見了面。我穿著中國服裝，我的朋友們對其兩側的高開衩感到有點不安，並不斷提醒我把它掩蓋起來。我們會見了許多國會議員和參議員的太太們。我問自己，這能否被看成我們未來之路的一種激勵？
我埋頭在圖書館裡攻讀，一直避免碰上周末公共汽車上一直避免碰上周末滿車的耶魯人。
對我來說，適應美國生活是個難題。有九年之久我無法看到我的家人。我想邀請我的父親參加我在哈佛大學的博士畢業典禮，但他在之前的一年裡去世了。此外，在最初的那幾年，美國文化的某些方面還令人不安。我和其他兩個中國女孩參觀了位於弗吉尼亞州的最高法院，我們要找洗手間。我們面臨的是決定是應該推標有「白人」還是「有色人」的門。當我們上一輛種族隔離的公交車時，我們再次面臨這個抉擇。這是我對種族歧視的初次體驗。當然，自那時起，美國已經取得了巨大的進步！
我永遠無法報答瓦薩的慷慨：從讓學校書店付我書費的院長到給我衣服穿的瓦薩女孩。生理學教授露絲·康克林給了我一份工作，所以我可以賺一些錢。我燙她的套裝時燒了一個大洞。我自我解僱，新工作是將她花園裡的泥土從一邊搬到到另一邊。
因為我在校園裡從不必擔心個人經濟狀況，我可以完全集中在我的學習當中，連續幾個小時把自己深藏在圖書館的地下室里。瓦瑟這樣地厚待我，令我受寵若驚。所有的支持---情感上的和經濟上的---為我提供了成功學者所需的巨大鼓舞。I could focus completely on my studies, hiding myself in the library』s basement for hours on end. I was thrilled with how well Vassar treated me. All of the support — emotional and financial — provided me with great inspiration to be a successful scholar.
我修了一些藝術課程，在那裡我用水彩和中國水墨在宣紙上繪畫。我沒有錢買一個畫框，但物理教授莫妮卡·西莉亞買了一個美麗的畫框，將這幅畫掛在她家。
我曾想成為一個藝術家，但當讀了居里夫人的傳記後，我決定將一生獻給科學。在瓦薩期間，1962年和1963年我作為暑期學生在位於長島的布魯克海文國家實驗室工作，被粒子物理的研究迷住了。那些都是激動人心的時刻，充滿了發現。在那裡，我第一次見到我未來的夫君。
1963年當我以最優等生和優等生榮譽學會成員從瓦薩畢業後，我接受了哈佛的獎學金，同時接受我的還有伯克利、哥倫比亞大學和耶魯大學。普林斯頓大學寫道，他們只接受本校教授的太太。加州理工學院寫道，他們沒有女生宿舍，因而不會接受女性，除非她們是「例外的」！
我在哈佛的第一年極端困難：男孩在男生宿舍一起做功課；婦女不得去那裡。我是物理課上唯一的女性。在第一年（1963年至1964年）年底，我被授予碩士學位---這是女性被允許從哈佛拿到研究生學位的第一年。以前只有拉德克利夫學院可以頒發這樣的學位給女性。
1964年5月，在我拿到碩士學位的畢業那天，我和一些同學在哈佛廣場加入了提供給畢業生的一次免費午餐。一名警衛要我離開，我被踢出了哈佛廣場。有人告訴我，100年來沒有女人被允許參加這個畢業典禮午餐；我眼中含淚離開了我的朋友。
在哈佛，瓊·貝茲的``我們將克服""是我最喜歡的一首歌。
At Harvard, 「we shall overcome」 by Joan Baez was my favourite song.
1970年，獲得哈佛博士學位的我成了麻省理工學院的一個副研究員，並參與1974年在布魯克海文國家實驗室發現了粲夸克。我的導師丁肇中教授1976年由於這一發現與斯坦福大學的伯頓·里克特教授一起被授予諾貝爾物理獎。
1977年，我成為威斯康星大學麥迪遜分校的助理教授。另一個女物理學家和我是這所那時已超過一百年歷史的大學最早的物理女教授。
1979年，我是發現膠子的領軍人物，成為1995年歐洲物理學會高能物理獎的共同獲得者。膠子是一種新的粒子，是強作用力的載體。它負責將夸克結合在一起以形成質子和中子。這項研究是在漢堡的德國國家實驗室(DESY)進行的。
在接下來的1996年，我被當選為美國藝術和科學院的院士。
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到處都是陽光和雨露Start small, Grow big |
正如你可以想像的那樣，在60年代、70年代甚至80年代，女人要在科學領域工作並不總是那麼容易的。我記得在《生活》雜誌上讀到，如果你是一個男人，人們假設你強，直到你被證明不強為止。如果你是一個女人，人們假設你沒有競爭性，直到你證明你有為止。早期我許多次碰到那種思路。如果你是一個女人，有些事不是很公平，如你說出來，就讓人心煩意亂。當我成功時，人們會指著我說我是個好鬥的人。有人把我叫做龍女。我不是這樣的，但有些人給你勾勒出這種形象。最後，你必須能免疫於這種批評。你必須接受一個事實，即有些人會認為你是能力不足。他們沒有看到，如果你成功了，那是因為你拚命工作，並為之努力。我已經完全將自己的生命投入於科學。即使是今天，由於種族和性別歧視，我仍然不時遇到問題。
在1970年末，當我還是威斯康辛大學的助理教授時，在那個年齡，我必須決定我是否應該有小孩。我丈夫和我談論了這個問題，意識到如果我這樣做，我可能不會獲得終身職位，我將失去我所有的科研經費。現在的今天，你絕不會想到這一點，但在那些日子裡它是一個現實。我不得不做這個決定。
然後我轉向將科學發現和青年學者的教育作為我的主要任務。 超過50個研究生已在我的指導下獲得博士學位。許多人繼續到著名的地方獲得博士後的職位---哈佛大學、麻省理工學院、普林斯頓大學和斯坦福大學等。他們中有些人現在身居大學中非常引人注目的教職。33個我以前的學生和博士後現在已經是美國和世界各地的教授。另外一個有11個擁有研究實驗室的永久職位。其他在政府或在世界各地的行業工作。我很為他們感到驕傲，並把他們視為我的家庭成員。通過他們，我的靈感已經到達了全美國和世界其他地區。
我的研究生怎樣受益於與我一起工作呢？我的學生和我一起在歐洲核子研究中心的國際環境中工作，他們有機會參與並見證物理學的重大發現。他們學會了承受巨大時間壓力必須解決問題的能力，這對他們來說是非常好的訓練。他們得到訓練的另一部分是競爭力。它們不能是緩慢前進的。他們與其他許多國家的年輕物理學家不斷地友好競爭。這種類型的訓練在國際化、全球化的舞台上極為重要。
是的，我曾被警告，亞洲女性在由白人男性主導的領域中有一個職業生涯，這將是很難的事；但是瓦瑟和哈佛的學位為我提供了面對這一挑戰所必備的自信心和資質。特別是，瓦瑟學院給了我獨一無二的機會來美國。瓦瑟已經在我的生命中發揮了舉足輕重的作用，並鋪平了我成功職業生涯的道路。
在我的職業生涯，我要感謝很多。感謝榜上的第一個當然非瓦瑟莫屬；我希格斯粒子發現的份額中很大一部分屬於瓦薩學院。
這個演講也獻給我的94歲高齡的母親來英：她因是一個中國村莊的女孩而不讓上學，但她一直視教育對她的孩子們極端重要；獻給我的弟弟餘明倫和他的妻子琳恩，他們的友誼及竭誠奉獻我的母親對我有永恆的影響；也獻給我的丈夫吳大峻，他極大地支持了我的事業。
我心懷感激之情地重申我對威斯康星大學麥迪遜分校和美國能源部對我研究巨大支持的衷心謝意。
1963年，我如你們一樣，在這日落湖畔，歡欣鼓舞。正是在這裡，我做出決定，要將我的一生獻給科學，並為人類做出有意義的貢獻。從那時起，我在生活和科學中經歷過許多發現的喜悅。上下求索之路或許漫長而多艱。它也常常是漫長而艱難的。當你受阻遇到挫折，你跌倒了，但你又回來了。在我們世界的每一個方面，從科學、社會、藝術到它們之間的一切東西，我們都需要你們。相信自己。牢牢地掌握好你的決心，你一定會做出偉大的事情。
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盡情綻放，奇蹟發生 |
在過去的四年中，瓦瑟已經賦予你們友誼、創造力和堅韌性，離開這裡，你們就要實現偉大的事業。今天，你們將領取學位。這將是你們在未來的征程上最有價值的關鍵點。
別人懷疑時你必須堅信。別人不做時你必須行動。要敢為人先！你不能等著別人來請你！
瓦薩2014屆！正直地生活，讓你的良心引導你前進。成為先驅，跟隨你的心，貢獻於人類的未來。帶著瓦薩的教育，以及堅毅與決心，成功將在你的面前和你的命運中出現。
有信心，運氣就會跟著你。
再次感謝給予我深厚的榮幸。祝賀瓦薩2014屆！
英文原稿
From Vassar to the Discovery of the Higgs Particle
President Hill, Professor Feroe, the Board of Trustees, the eminent faculty, proud parents and grandparents and Vassar graduates of the class of 2014:
Thank you for giving me this great honor and wonderful opportunity to address to-day』s 150 commencement ceremony.
Professor Feroe tells me that I am the first research scientist in 23 years and the first physicist ever to deliver a Vassar commencement address.
I hope that you will find the story of my journey from Vassar to the discovery of the Higgs Particle inspiring and interesting.
I set myself a goal of contributing to at least three major physics discoveries in my lifetime. So far I have participated in the discoveries of the charm quark, the gluon, and the Higgs particle. My third eminent participation is in the discovery of the Higgs particle. On July 4, 2012, the discovery of the Higgs particle was announced; I am sure you have read about it in New York Times or CNN. This is a discovery in which my Wisconsin group members and I played a prominent role. This project is so gigantic that two independent teams of 3000 physicists each, the ATLAS and CMS collaborations, worked at the Large Hadron Collider at the laboratory CERN – the European Center for Nuclear Research in Geneva, Switzerland. The discovery was a culmination of two decades of hard work by more than 6000 scientists from 56 nations and about 200 institutions from all over the world.
The most effective way to produce a Higgs particle is by colliding two very energetic protons. To find a Higgs particle, it is like looking for a needle in a haystack, the size of a football stadium.
You may ask why do electrons, protons, neutrons and the other particles in our universe have the masses they do. Discovering the Higgs particle takes us a step closer to answering this question.
The Higgs Particle is also called the God Particle. It is responsible for all masses, from electrons to humans to galaxies. Without this particle, there would be no atoms, no molecules, no cells and of course no humans.
This particle was proposed in 1964 by three theoretical physicists Fran?ois Englert, Robert Brout and Peter Higgs. Englert and Higgs were awarded the Nobel Prize in Physics last year; Brout unfortunately died two years ago.
Let me now share with you the joy of discovery. At midnight June 25, 2012, nine days before the announcement of the Higgs discovery, members in my Wisconsin group, after a number of sleepless nights, obtained a clear evidence of the Higgs particle. At 3pm on the same day, there was a commotion in the Wisconsin corridor in the ground floor of Building 32 at CERN. We heard my graduate student Haichen Wang saying, "Haoshuang is going to announce the discovery of the Higgs!" Our first reaction was to consider it as a joke, so when we entered my student Haoshuang Ji"s office, we had smiles on our faces. Those smiles suddenly became much bigger as we looked at his computer printout of a Higgs signal plot. Pretty soon, cheers were ringing down the Wisconsin corridor. Haichen Wang was video recording the excitement. We made a large copy of this Higgs signal plot and all my group members signed on it. This signed document is now displayed on the wall of the Wisconsin corridor at CERN.
Other groups in the two collaborations observed the same result, with the same excitement. They also have their own stories to tell.
On the day of the announcement of the discovery on July 4, 2012, the auditorium at CERN was locked until 9am. In order to encourage all the students and postdocs of my group to witness the scientific event of the century, I promised a reward of $100 to whoever would line up outside the auditorium overnight. They all got in. At the end of the announcement of the discovery, I went to shake hands with Prof. Higgs. I told him "I have been looking for you for over 20 years". And I will always cherish his reply: "Now, you have found me」. In fact, it had taken me thirty two years, from 1980 to 2012.
On March 5, 2013 my photo with four other physicists appeared on the front page of New York Times. The heading: Chasing the Higgs – Struggle, and finally triumph, in the search for physics』 most elusive particle. This article was written by Dennis Overbye.
Now, I would like to share with you my journey from Vassar to the Higgs discovery.
I was born in Hong Kong during the Japanese occupation. My mother, with me in her arms, ran in and out of bomb shelters. My mother was the sixth concubine of my father who was a well-known businessman in Hong Kong. However she was not the favorite of my father"s wives. My mother and I were cast out and we were put to live in a slum. My mother and my younger brother lived in a rented small bedroom and I had a rented bed in a corridor in a rice shop. I grew up with a strong determination to be financially independent of men.
At the end of each school day, we lined up to say good bye to our teacher with a whip in his hand. I was in a school overcrowded with students. Every time when an officer from the Education Department came for inspection, I had to hide.
Until I was 12 years old, I rarely saw my father.
We then moved to an apartment and I would see my father once a week for a couple of hours. I impressed my father when he found out that I was able to multiply a 3 digit number by another 3 digit number in my head. My father believed that the key to success is to be good in English and arithmetic.
My mother grew up in a farm in China and girls were not allowed to go to school. Hence my mother cannot read and cannot write and has never worked. However my mother is the most inspiring person in my life. She realized early on in my childhood the tremendous value of education. She did everything in her power to move me and my younger brother from schools in the slum to missionary schools in Hong Kong.
When I graduated from high school in 1959, my father did not want me to go to college. "You should now earn your living, and support your mother." I secretly applied to 50 colleges and universities in USA, asking for a full scholarship. There were only four colleges that said they would consider me, all women colleges – Agnes Scott College in Georgia, Randolph-Macon Woman』s College in Virginia, Connecticut College and Vassar. I was rejected by the first three. So I was about to be rejected by the whole United States! While in despair, in April 1960, I was overjoyed to receive a telegram informing me that I was accepted by Vassar with a full scholarship. Truly, God decided to send me to Vassar.
I told my father I was accepted by Vassar. He happened to be in New York at the time, staying with a friend whose daughter was about to graduate from Vassar in May, class of 1960 (I would like to find and meet with this alumna of class 1960.). When he attended her commencement ceremony right here in May 1960, my father realized that Vassar is a very prestigious college. However he complained that during the reception only peanuts were served. He was proud of my coming to Vassar. With 300 dollars, he bought me tickets to go from Hong Kong to San Francisco by ship, President Wilson line, which took 17 days and then to New York by train. He gave me $40 for pocket money. He warned me not to go to parties. If I were to lose my scholarship, that would be it!
The day I boarded the ship was the last time I saw my father.
During my trip from Hong Kong to San Francisco, we encountered several typhoons. Few people were in the dining room. I saw my apple rolling from one side of the ship to the other. When the ship disembarked in San Francisco, several Vassar alumnae were waiting for me with home baked cakes. I then took the train from San Francisco to New York on a 5 days journey with their cakes as my only food. I did not want to spend any money on meals. At New York, I was again picked up by several Vassar alumnae.
At Vassar, I had a full scholarship with room and board, and the American girls donated clothes for foreign students, so I didn"t have to go shopping. Vassar even sent me to a summer school in Richmond, Virginia the first summer I was here because my English was so poor that I couldn"t pass my requirement.
In my first year, I, together with eight other foreign students, were invited to the White House during Easter vacation to meet Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy 』51. I wore a Chinese dress, and my friends were uneasy about the high slits on the sides and kept reminding me to conceal it. We met many wives of congressmen and senators. I was asking myself whether this was intended as an aspiration for our future path.
I buried myself in the library, forever avoiding weekend busloads of Yale men.
My adjustment to the United States was a difficult one. I was unable to see my family for nine long years. I wanted to invite my father to my Ph.D. graduation at Harvard but he died a year earlier.
I can never repay Vassar』s generosity, from the dean who allowed me to charge all my books to the college store and to the Vassar girls who gave me clothes to wear. Professor [of physiology] Ruth Conklin created a job for me so I could earn some money. I ironed her suits and burned a big hole in one. My new job was to move piles of mud from one side of her garden to the other.
Because I never had to worry about my finances on campus, I could focus completely on my studies, hiding myself in the library』s basement for hours on end. I was thrilled with how well Vassar treated me. All of the support — emotional and financial — provided me with great inspiration to be a successful scholar.
I wanted to be an artist until I read Marie Curie』s biography and decided to devote my life to science. During my stay at Vassar, I worked as a summer student in 1962 and 1963 at Brookhaven National Laboratory on Long Island where I became captivated by the study of particle physics. Those were exciting times, full of discoveries. There I first met my future husband.
After graduating from Vassar in 1963 with summa cum laude and Phi Beta Kappa, I was accepted by Harvard with a fellowship, and also offers from Berkeley, Columbia and Yale. Princeton wrote that they only accepted women if they were wives of faculty members. Caltech wrote that they did not have a women"s dormitory, and would not accept women unless they were "exceptional"!
My first year at Harvard was extremely difficult: boys did homework together in the men"s dormitories; women were not allowed to go there. I was the only woman in physics in my class. At the end of first year (1963-1964), I was awarded a Master』s Degree – it was the first year when women were allowed to get a graduate degree from Harvard.
In May 1964, on graduation day for my Master degree, I joined some of my classmates for a free lunch offered to new graduates in the Harvard Yard. A guard asked me to leave and I was kicked out of the Harvard Yard. I was told that no woman had been allowed to this commencement lunch in 100 years; I left my friends with tears in my eyes.
At Harvard, 「we shall overcome」 by Joan Baez was my favourite song.
In 1970, with a Ph.D. degree from Harvard, I became a research associate at MIT, participating in the charm quark discovery in 1974 at the Brookhaven National Laboratory. My supervisor, Professor Samuel Ting, was awarded a Nobel Prize in 1976 for this discovery together with Professor Burton Richter of Stanford.
In 1977, I became an assistant professor at the University of Wisconsin-Madison. Another woman physicist and I were the first women professors of Physics ever in this University, at that time already over a hundred years old.
In 1979, I was the leading figure in the gluon discovery and I was the co-recipient of the 1995 European Physical Society Prize for High Energy Physics. The gluon was a new particle responsible for binding quarks together to form protons and neutrons. This research was done in the German National Laboratory (DESY) in Hamburg.
The following year in 1996, I was elected to be a fellow of the American Academy of Arts and Sciences.
As you can imagine, it was not always easy for a woman to be in the scientific field in the 60s, 70s and even 80s. I remember reading in Life magazine that, if you are a man, people assume you are competent until you prove you are not. If you are a woman, people assume you are not competent until you prove you are. I encountered that mentality a lot early on. When I became successful, people would point to me and say that I am an aggressive person. You must be immune to this kind of criticism.
In late 1970 when I was an assistant professor in the University of Wisconsin, I was at the age when I had to decide whether I should have children or not. My husband and I realized that if I did so, I probably would not get tenure and I would lose all my research funding. Now, today, you would never think about that, but in those days it was a reality. That was the decision I had to make.
I then turned to scientific discoveries and education of young scholars as my primary missions. Over 50 graduate students have received Ph.D. degrees under my supervision. Many moved on to take positions at prestigious places – Harvard, MIT, Princeton and Stanford, for example. Thirty three of my former students and postdocs are now professors in the US and worldwide. Others work in governments or in industries all over the world. I am extremely proud of them and consider them as members of my family. Through them my inspiration has reached out all over the US and in other parts of the world.
How do my graduate students benefit from working with me? My students work with me at CERN in an international environment, and they have a chance to participate in and witness major discoveries in physics. They learn to solve problems under tremendous time pressure. They cannot be slow. They are constantly in a friendly competition with young physicists from many other countries. This type of training is especially important in the international, global arena.
Yes, I was warned that it would be hard for an Asian female to have a career in a field dominated by white males; but Vassar and Harvard degrees provided me with the self-confidence and credentials necessary for this challenge. In particular, Vassar College gave me the exclusive opportunity to come to America. Vassar has played a pivotal role in my life and has paved my way to a successful career.
In my career, I am indebted to many. The first one on the list is of course Vassar; a big part of my share of the Higgs discovery belongs to Vassar College.
This address is also dedicated to my 94 years old mother, Ying Lai: she was not allowed to attend school but she has valued education to be of the utmost importance for her children; to my younger brother Ming Lun Yu and his wife Lynne, their friendship and dedication to my mother have an eternal influence on my life, and to my husband Tai Tsun Wu, who is tremendously supportive of my career.
I would also like to extend my heart-felt thanks to the marvellous support of my research from the University of Wisconsin-Madison and the U.S. Department of Energy.
In 1963, I was here by the Sunset Lake, just like you. I was overjoyed. Right here, I made the resolution to devote my life to science and to make a significant contribution to humanity. Since then I have experienced the joy of discoveries, in life as in science. The search may be long or difficult. Often times, it is long and difficult. But when obstacles strike, you fall down and you get back up. We need you in every aspect of our world, from science to society to the arts and everything in between. You believe in yourself. You hold true to your determination. And you will do something great.
Over the past four years, Vassar has armed you with the friendship, and the creativity, and the tenacity to leave this place and achieve great things. Today, you are receiving your degrees. It is your determination that will be most valuable in the journey ahead.
You must believe where others do not. You must act where others cannot. You must lead where others will not. You cannot wait for someone to invite you!
Vassar Class of 2014! Live with integrity and let your conscience be your guide. Be a pioneer and follow your heart, contributing to future human kind. With a Vassar education, and with fierce perseverance and determination, success will be ahead of you and your destiny.
Have faith and luck will follow you.
Thank you again for the profound honor of addressing you, and congratulations Vassar Class of 2014!
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